There has to be a section for that flotsam and jetsom that doesn't fit anywhere else.

And here it is.

http://www.canoe.ca/JamMoviesArtistsM/martin_steve.html
Sunday, August 15, 1999
Gotta light, Steve?
NATASHA STOYNOFF
Toronto Sun

Gotta light? That's one question you'll never hear from funnyman Steve Martin, who says he abhors smoking and actually moved out of L.A. for awhile because of it.

"To me, smoking is such a blatant intrusion," Martin said recently, lounging on one of the Beverly Hills' Four Seasons' smoke-free floors.

"I used to sit on an airplane and a guy would light up next to me. Besides being a health issue, it's just a courtesy issue to me."

Now back in L.A., he says the smog has lifted after the new no-smoking laws have taken effect in restaurants.

"It's much better now ... you can breathe," he says.

And he's all for self-improvement, health-wise and spiritual-wise.

In conjunction with his smoking strike, he also took a few years off from acting to just read, write and travel.

"I realized a long time ago that working on acting is best done by working on yourself. The smarter and richer you become as a person, the better actor you're going to be because you're going to know more about people."
 

ON ESCAPISM IN FATHER OF THE BRIDE: "Everything is kind of heightened in the movie and everything is kind of perfect. In that way it is escapism. But in the best possible sense. The emotions are very, very true. In an escapist action movie, the emotions are not real."

ON LIFE AT 50, LOOKING BACK: "This time's better. I know more. Everything has its value at the time. The thing about it then is that you're new and you're exciting to yourself and to other people. You just can't be new ever again."

ON AGING: "I think about it all the time and try to get it in place and try not to stay too young."

WHAT MAKES A GOOD WRITER? "Reading, thinking, experiencing life, having your heart broken, having joy, observing and being observed."

SCHOOL OF HOLLYWOOD: "The great thing about Hollywood is, there's no degree to get, there's no test you can take to pass it. It's just about your will and your talent."

FINANCIALLY-CHALLENGED FILMMAKING: "I remember hearing stories early on about people making movies on their credit cards. I'm sure that's a common thing now."
 

"I'm happiest when I'm out there doing the show. I'm scared the rest of the time," Hall confesses. "I don't want to go back where I started."
 

I am thirty one years old. Syosset High School (Long Island, NY) class of 1985. Sometimes I like to think that I was not a geek but then I remember when I asked my friend Ron Garner, "what do you do when you feel up a girl?" He replied, "circles."

I was terrible at sports, so I became obsessed with comedy. When I was in seventh grade I went on vacation to California. While driving through Beverly Hills I saw Steve Martin standing outside on his lawn.  I asked him for an autograph. He said he didn't sign autographs at his house. I then asked him to sign it in the street. He refused.

I ran home and wrote him a letter asking for an apology. "How dare you not give me an autograph. If I didn't buy your  records and see your movies you wouldn't be able to afford that house. If you do not send me a written apology I will send your address to homes of the stars and you will have tour buses passing by your house night and day."

Three months later I received an autographed book of "Cruel Shoes." In it he wrote, "To Judd, I'm sorry. I didn't realize I was speaking to the Judd Apatow." That small kindness only made me more obsessed with comedy.

Judd Apatow is a comic writer/ executive producer/ etc. Though, not he was in seventh grade when he had the encounter.
 

Steve Martin once blindfolded Barbara Walters and led her to a rundown shack for an interview, smuggled in and hung a bogus painting called "La Crapola" at the Los Angeles County Museum of Art, and rented another museum to put on a brilliant mime act called the "Steve Martin Invisible Art Show."

Martin is now an art connoisseur and is known to sequester himself alone in a room of paintings for hours on end to refresh his mind and spirit. He was the "wild and crazy guy," the one with the fake arrow through his head, and yet all this was well-planned, well-promoted and dead serious business by a very private and introspective man.

Or so goes "Steve Martin: The Magic Years," a book written by Morris Walker, Martin's childhood buddy and former comedy partner, and released earlier this year. Somewhere in Steve Martin, wackiness and seriousness coexist, and maybe it helps to find out that Martin once said that what's funny is not chaos amid chaos but rather chaos amid order. Or that Elvis, upon meeting Martin once in Las Vegas, told him that he had "a very oblique sense of humor."

"Steve Martin is a very serious man," Walker said during a recent telephone interview from his home in Oregon. "I wouldn't say cold, but he's cool and seriously calculating. Steve, from an early age, was very focused on making a lot of money. When his comedy wasn't working, it was his tenacity and business ethic that got him to the top. He was and is a natural promoter."

Of course, it also helps to be multitalented, charismatic, clever and hard-working, as Walker also says about his friend. Martin began performing magic tricks while working at Disneyland in his youth, was writing for the old Smothers Brothers show at age 21, won an Emmy at 23, was associated with the original "Saturday Night Live" troupe, appeared on and filled in for Johnny Carson on "The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson," and has gone on to star in more than two dozen movies. Oh yeah, and landed another major gig: Martin, 55, will be the host at Sunday night's 73rd annual Academy Awards.

"I certainly wouldn't want to be him (that night)," Walker said. "That takes a lot of guts, a lot of chutzpah, and he's the man for the job.

"I think Steve's greatest talent is his quick wit, his ability to ad-lib. That's why people are in store for such a treat at the Oscars. As well-prepared and planned out as it is, whatever he has to ad-lib through will be the highlights of the show."

(Martin, said not be granting interviews to anyone prior to the Oscars, declined several requests for comments for this story. On the book jacket, Martin is quoted as saying, "Finally, a book about me! I loved this book and fell deeply in love with the central character.")

The breezy book, just shy of 275 pages, focuses primarily on the so-called "magic years" from sixth grade through high school when Martin and Walker were comedy pals, first at Disneyland and later as the class clowns at schools in Orange County.

It delves a little into Martin's subsequent fame, fortune and failed relationships with women such as Bernadette Peters and Victoria Tennant. But about as racy as it gets is the revelation that Martin once slept with Walker's sister -- "she's proud of that," Walker said.

Which, the author explained, is a big reason why the book is out only now, some 22 years after he started writing it. It was rejected more than once.

"At one point, publishers said, 'Give us some dirt, something sleazy,' " Walker recalled. "But there isn't a lot of that to say about him. How often do you see anything negative about Steve Martin?"

His story

Martin was born in Waco, Texas, and moved with his family to Orange County at a young age. Soon, he and Walker were working at Disneyland, first selling guidebooks and then as performers. Martin became fascinated with magicians and performers he saw there.

The pair pulled pranks, invented their own silly code languages, and were elected high school cheerleaders under a campaign that they were "99 percent school spirit and 1 percent human." Martin, a good athlete, refused to play football because he thought he might break the fingers so crucial to his magic act.

They were known as the Gopher Boys and later formed a group called Fools Unlimited that smuggled the "La Crapola" painting into the Los Angeles County Museum of Art. The elaborate ruse took weeks to plan, and it took three hours to get the painting past security guards and onto a display wall on the third floor. Martin, Walker and the others then waited around as people passed by what they assumed was fine art.

"It was mounted on particle board, had wax on it and old cigarette butt stains," Walker said, laughing. "It had the name on the back, and we all signed it. I'd like to know where it is today. It's probably in some executive's house."

In his acts, Martin was euphoric and manic, but at home he was quiet and reclusive, Walker writes. Martin rarely spoke to his parents or his sister. He'd spend hours in his room, perfecting his magic tricks, banjo playing, mime and comedy routines. Even then, Martin combined physical humor with intellectual, thought-provoking comedy.

Though he could be warm and personable, Martin had a loner side to him. While he exploded into the galaxy of stars, he also imploded into his own microcosm, Walker observes.

"Tommy Smothers once told me that being with Steve was like being alone," Walker said.

The pair split up around the end of high school. While Martin went on to superstardom and millions, Walker and his family struggled as a comic act on the road, grinding out $50-a-night gigs across the country.

"I'd be a liar if I said I wasn't jealous at times," Walker said, then allowed, "but if I was 1 percent as talented as Steve, that would set me up for life."

Walker and his family perform as "The Earthwalkers" in concerts around the country. Walker, who lives in Corvallis, Ore., also owns a production company that makes Quicktime movies and music videos for Web sites.

"I found love and happiness and family," he said. "Steve found wealth and fame and success. Both of those life experiences are valid, and both have highs and lows."

Walker seems concerned that Martin, after a bitter divorce from Tennant, is alone. In the book, he writes that, for Martin, romance was never a flight of fancy and offers that only part of Martin's existence is open to companionship.

"I think Steve would absolutely be a changed man if he met the perfect woman and had a child," Walker said.

Walker is no longer part of Martin's tight inner circle but still talks to him occasionally. Reflecting back on those childhood days, he said he is proud to have contributed in some way to Martin's legacy.

"We played off each other, challenged each other," he said. "It was a game to see who could make who laugh the hardest. We'd laugh so hard, we'd cry. Maybe that's where it all started."

And Walker has an inkling as to why everything Martin touched -- from comedy to books to plays to collecting art -- turned to magic.

"Someone once asked Steve Martin before he went on why he's always so funny," Walker said, "and Steve replied, 'Before I go on, I put a piece of baloney in each of my shoes, so that when I walk out there, I feel funny.'
 

Ventura County Star (California)
March 20, 2001 Tuesday
Life; Pg. E01
He's a wild and serious guy; In a new biography, Steve Martin's childhood friend recalls a quiet wit
Brett Johnson; Staff writer

Steve Martin once blindfolded Barbara Walters and led her to a rundown shack for an interview, smuggled in and hung a bogus painting called "La Crapola" at the Los Angeles County Museum of Art, and rented another museum to put on a brilliant mime act called the "Steve Martin Invisible Art Show." 

Martin is now an art connoisseur and is known to sequester himself alone in a room of paintings for hours on end to refresh his mind and spirit. He was the "wild and crazy guy," the one with the fake arrow through his head, and yet all this was well-planned, well-promoted and dead serious business by a very private and introspective man. 

Or so goes "Steve Martin: The Magic Years," a book written by Morris Walker, Martin's childhood buddy and former comedy partner, and released earlier this year. Somewhere in Steve Martin, wackiness and seriousness coexist, and maybe it helps to find out that Martin once said that what's funny is not chaos amid chaos but rather chaos amid order. Or that Elvis, upon meeting Martin once in Las Vegas, told him that he had "a very oblique sense of humor."  

"Steve Martin is a very serious man," Walker said during a recent telephone interview from his home in Oregon. "I wouldn't say cold, but he's cool and seriously calculating. Steve, from an early age, was very focused on making a lot of money. When his comedy wasn't working, it was his tenacity and business ethic that got him to the top. He was and is a natural promoter." 

Of course, it also helps to be multitalented, charismatic, clever and hard-working, as Walker also says about his friend. Martin began performing magic tricks while working at Disneyland in his youth, was writing for the old Smothers Brothers show at age 21, won an Emmy at 23, was associated with the original "Saturday Night Live" troupe, appeared on and filled in for Johnny Carson on "The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson," and has gone on to star in more than two dozen movies. Oh yeah, and landed another major gig: Martin, 55, will be the host at Sunday night's 73rd annual Academy Awards. 

"I certainly wouldn't want to be him (that night)," Walker said. "That takes a lot of guts, a lot of chutzpah, and he's the man for the job. 

"I think Steve's greatest talent is his quick wit, his ability to ad-lib. That's why people are in store for such a treat at the Oscars. As well-prepared and planned out as it is, whatever he has to ad-lib through will be the highlights of the show." 

(Martin, said not be granting interviews to anyone prior to the Oscars, declined several requests for comments for this story. On the book jacket, Martin is quoted as saying, "Finally, a book about me! I loved this book and fell deeply in love with the central character.") 

The breezy book, just shy of 275 pages, focuses primarily on the so-called "magic years" from sixth grade through high school when Martin and Walker were comedy pals, first at Disneyland and later as the class clowns at schools in Orange County. 

It delves a little into Martin's subsequent fame, fortune and failed relationships with women such as Bernadette Peters and Victoria Tennant. But about as racy as it gets is the revelation that Martin once slept with Walker's sister -- "she's proud of that," Walker said. 

Which, the author explained, is a big reason why the book is out only now, some 22 years after he started writing it. It was rejected more than once. 

"At one point, publishers said, 'Give us some dirt, something sleazy,' " Walker recalled. "But there isn't a lot of that to say about him. How often do you see anything negative about Steve Martin?" 

His story 

Martin was born in Waco, Texas, and moved with his family to Orange County at a young age. Soon, he and Walker were working at Disneyland, first selling guidebooks and then as performers. Martin became fascinated with magicians and performers he saw there. 

The pair pulled pranks, invented their own silly code languages, and were elected high school cheerleaders under a campaign that they were "99 percent school spirit and 1 percent human." Martin, a good athlete, refused to play football because he thought he might break the fingers so crucial to his magic act. 

They were known as the Gopher Boys and later formed a group called Fools Unlimited that smuggled the "La Crapola" painting into the Los Angeles County Museum of Art. The elaborate ruse took weeks to plan, and it took three hours to get the painting past security guards and onto a display wall on the third floor. Martin, Walker and the others then waited around as people passed by what they assumed was fine art. 

"It was mounted on particle board, had wax on it and old cigarette butt stains," Walker said, laughing. "It had the name on the back, and we all signed it. I'd like to know where it is today. It's probably in some executive's house." 

In his acts, Martin was euphoric and manic, but at home he was quiet and reclusive, Walker writes. Martin rarely spoke to his parents or his sister. He'd spend hours in his room, perfecting his magic tricks, banjo playing, mime and comedy routines. Even then, Martin combined physical humor with intellectual, thought-provoking comedy. 

Though he could be warm and personable, Martin had a loner side to him. While he exploded into the galaxy of stars, he also imploded into his own microcosm, Walker observes. 

"Tommy Smothers once told me that being with Steve was like being alone," Walker said. 

The pair split up around the end of high school. While Martin went on to superstardom and millions, Walker and his family struggled as a comic act on the road, grinding out $50-a-night gigs across the country. 

"I'd be a liar if I said I wasn't jealous at times," Walker said, then allowed, "but if I was 1 percent as talented as Steve, that would set me up for life." 

Walker and his family perform as "The Earthwalkers" in concerts around the country. Walker, who lives in Corvallis, Ore., also owns a production company that makes Quicktime movies and music videos for Web sites. 

"I found love and happiness and family," he said. "Steve found wealth and fame and success. Both of those life experiences are valid, and both have highs and lows." 

Walker seems concerned that Martin, after a bitter divorce from Tennant, is alone. In the book, he writes that, for Martin, romance was never a flight of fancy and offers that only part of Martin's existence is open to companionship. 

"I think Steve would absolutely be a changed man if he met the perfect woman and had a child," Walker said. 

Walker is no longer part of Martin's tight inner circle but still talks to him occasionally. Reflecting back on those childhood days, he said he is proud to have contributed in some way to Martin's legacy. 

"We played off each other, challenged each other," he said. "It was a game to see who could make who laugh the hardest. We'd laugh so hard, we'd cry. E Maybe that's where it all started." 

And Walker has an inkling as to why everything Martin touched -- from comedy to books to plays to collecting art -- turned to magic. 

"Someone once asked Steve Martin before he went on why he's always so funny," Walker said, "and Steve replied, 'Before I go on, I put a piece of baloney in each of my shoes, so that when I walk out there, I feel funny.' "  
 

St. Louis Post-Dispatch (Missouri)
August 5, 1989, SATURDAY
FIVE STAR Edition
NEWS; Pg. 2A
PEOPLE COLUMN 

Actor-comedian STEVE MARTIN says being a parent is not much fun and games. ''It's like the LENNY BRUCE story about the Doberman pinscher,'' he told USA Weekend in its Aug. 4-6 issue. ''You train him, you raise him, you love him . . . 10 years later, he kills you.'' Martin, 43, stars in RON HOWARD's movie, ''Parenthood,'' as Gil Buckman, a father who ''wants to try hard, but he doesn't know quite what to do.'' Martin and his wife, actress VICTORIA TENNANT, have no children. But, he said, many of their friends do. He listed the four emotions of parenting: ''Rage, rage, rage and joy.'' And he offered this advice to those rearing children: ''Rather than getting serious with them and tough, I think you can accomplish a lot of the same things by being lighthearted, although it must be fairly impossible at times when your nerves are frazzled.''